第6章 The King of Jazz

Well Im the king of jazz now, thought Hokie Mokie to himself as he oiled the slide on his trombone. Hasnt been a bone man been king of jazz for many years. But now that Spicy MacLammermoor, the old king, is dead, I guess Im it. Maybe I better play a few notes out of this window here, to reassure myself.

"Wow!" said somebody standing on the sidewalk. "Did you hear that?" "I did," said his companion. "Can you distinguish our great homemade American jazz performers, each from the other?" "Used to could." "Then who was that playing?"

"Sounds like Hokie Mokie to me. Those few but perfectly selected notes have the real epiphanic glow." "The what?" "The real epiphanic glow, such as is obtained only by artists of the caliber of Hokie Mokie, whos from Pass Christian, Mississippi. Hes the king of jazz, now that Spicy MacLammermoor is gone."

Hokie Mokie put his trombone in its trombone case and went to a gig. At the gig everyone fell back before him, bowing. "Hi Bucky! Hi Zoot! Hi Freddie! Hi George! Hi Thad! Hi Roy! Hi Dexter! Hi Jo! Hi Willie! Hi Greens!" "What we gonna play, Hokie? You the king of jazz now, you gotta decide."

"How bout Smoke?" "Wow!" everybody said. "Did you hear that? Hokie Mokie can just knock a fella out, just the way he pronounces a word. What a intonation on that boy! God Almighty!" "I dont want to play Smoke, " somebody said. "Would you repeat that, stranger?"

"I dont want to play Smoke. Smoke is dull. I dont like the changes. I refuse to play Smoke. " "He refuses to play Smoke! But Hokie Mokie is the king of jazz and he says Smoke!" "Man, you from outa town or something? What do you mean you refuse to play Smoke? Howd you get on this gig anyhow? Who hired you?"

"I am Hideo Yamaguchi, from Tokyo, Japan." "Oh, youre one of those Japanese cats, eh?" "Yes Im the top trombone man in all of Japan." "Well youre welcome here until we hear you play. Tell me, is the Tennessee Tea Room still the top jazz place in Tokyo?"

"No, the top jazz place in Tokyo is the Square Box now." "Thats nice. OK, now we gonna play Smoke just like Hokie said. You ready, Hokie? OK, give you four for nothin. One! Two! Three! Four!" The two men who had been standing under Hokies window had followed him to the club. Now they said:

"Good God!" "Yes, thats Hokies famous English sunrise way of playing. Playing with lots of rays coming out of it, some red rays, some blue rays, some green rays, some green stemming from a violet center, some olive stemming from a tan center --" "That young Japanese fellow is pretty good, too."

"Yes, he is pretty good. And he holds his horn in a peculiar way. Thats frequently the mark of a superior player." "Bent over like that with his head between his knees -- good God, hes sensational!" Hes sensational, Hokie thought. Maybe I ought to kill him. But at that moment somebody came in the door pushing in front of him a four-and-one-half-octave marimba. Yes, it was Fat Man Jones, and he began to play even before he was fully in the door.

"Whatre we playing?" " Billies Bounce. " "Thats what I thought it was. Whatre we in?" "F." "Thats what I thought we were in. Didnt you use to play with Maynard?" "Yeah I was on that band for a while until I was in the hospital." "What for?" "I was tired." "What can we add to Hokies fantastic playing?" "How bout some rain or stars?" "Maybe thats presumptuous?" "Ask him if hed mind." "You ask him, Im scared. You dont fool around with the king of jazz. That young Japanese guys pretty good, too." "Hes sensational." "You think hes playing in Japanese?" "Well I dont think its English." This trombones been makin my neck green for thirty-five years, Hokie thought. How come I got to stand up to yet another challenge, this late in life? "Well, Hideo --" "Yes, Mr. Mokie?" "You did well on both Smoke and Billies Bounce. Youre just about as good as me, I regret to say. In fact, Ive decided youre better than me. Its a hideous thing to contemplate, but there it is. I have only been the king of jazz for twenty-four hours, but the unforgiving logic of this art demands we bow to Truth, when we hear it." "Maybe youre mistaken?" "No, I got ears. Im not mistaken. Hideo Yamaguchi is the new king of jazz." "You want to be king emeritus?" "No, Im just going to fold up my horn and steal away. This gig is yours, Hideo. You can pick the next tune." "How bout Cream?" "OK, you heard what Hideo said, its Cream. You ready, Hideo?" "Hokie, you dont have to leave. You can play too. Just move a little over to the side there --" "Thank you, Hideo, thats very gracious of you. I guess I will play a little, since Im still here. Sotto voce, of course." "Hideo is wonderful on Cream!" "Yes, I imagine its his best tune." "Whats that sound coming in from the side there?" "Which side?" "The left." "You mean that sound that sounds like the cutting edge of life? That sounds like polar bears crossing Arctic ice pans? That sounds like a herd of musk ox in full flight? That sounds like male walruses diving to the bottom of the sea? That sounds like fumaroles smoking on the slopes of Mt. Katmai? That sounds like the wild turkey walking through the deep, soft forest? That sounds like beavers chewing trees in an Appalachian marsh? That sounds like an oyster fungus growing on an aspen trunk? That sounds like a mule deer wandering a montane of the Sierra Nevada? That sounds like prairie dogs kissing? That sounds like witchgrass tumbling or a river meandering? That sounds like manatees munching seaweed at Cape Sable? That sounds like coatimundis moving in packs across the face of Arkansas? That sounds like --" "Good God, its Hokie! Even with a cup mute on, hes blowing Hideo right off the stand!" "Hideos playing on his knees now! Good God, hes reaching into his belt for a large steel sword -- Stop him!" "Wow! That was the most exciting Cream ever played! Is Hideo all right?" "Yes, somebody is getting him a glass of water." "Youre my man, Hokie! That was the dadblangedest thing I ever saw!" "Youre the king of jazz once again!" "Hokie Mokie is the most happening thing there is!" "Yes, Mr. Hokie sir, I have to admit it, you blew me right off the stand. I see I have many years of work and study before me still." "Thats OK, son. Dont think a thing about it. It happens to the best of us. Or it almost happens to the best of us. Now I want everybody to have a good time because were gonna play Flats. Flats is next." "With your permission, sir, I will return to my hotel and pack. I am most grateful for everything I have learned here." "Thats OK, Hideo. Have a nice day. He-he. Now, Flats. "